Delusion-Elle

I woke up in a strange way this morning. I was in the middle of a bad dream when I was jolted awake by my alarm. When I woke up, I was just lying on my back with my arms like glued to my sides. I dunno about you, but I've never woken up like that. And maybe it was because I was in the middle of a dream, but I woke up exhausted and I remained that way for the whole day. I fell asleep on the bus on the way to school, and on the way back home. I am currently thanking myself for my day off tomorrow.

My bad dream was... strange. I remember some sort of factory setting with conveyor belts. Then I remember this dark red/brown mansion with a winding road leading up to it (which kind of looked cartoonish because of the vibrant colours). Somehow I ended up inside and my mom was there belittling and berating me and all I know is that I just kept crying and everyone was mad at me for crying which only made me cry harder.

I guess I've had worse dreams, but I just felt really really really crappy. And this is probably the last dream (that I was consciously aware of/remembered) I've had in a month's time.

And following my dream-mom's biting words, today my brother was working on an assignment where he had to discuss some Canadian cities that were worth visiting. One of the ones my mom suggested was Victoria. So my brother's sitting there thinking of what to say about BC's boring-ass capital city and he asks my mom, "What's good about Victoria?"

I was in the room at the time, working on my own homework and I wasn't aware of what he was talking about so I gave a big "What!?"

My mom answered by saying, "I don't know what's good about Victoria, she can't even get a gay guy to like her, never mind a straight one."

My reaction: a combination of D: & T____T

My mom's response: "Oh well, Thomas is one I guess, but he barely even knows you so he doesn't count."

Jesus frickin' Christ.
I don't even know how I feel about that. I mean, I love my mom, but the combination of that bad dream and what she said was just kind of... Yuck and bad feelings all over.

I am so tired of everyone pushing for this "ideal" situation of "get a boyfriend (to be politically correct) significant other, get married, have kids, yay". You don't need all that business to live a rich, full life. Maybe my mind will change later, but I hate kids and I'm happy with the life I'm leading right now (okay, a little more creative freedom + INSPIRATION would be nice). And not everyone gets to live that "ideal" situation so stop pushing for it. There are tons of alternative lifestyles out there. Yes, I get that people just want the "best" but in the end I just want to be self-sufficient, independent, and happy.

I guess, what I'm trying to say is:
DON'T BOTHER ME ABOUT BOYFRIENDS, ETC. RIGHT NOW PLS. I LIKE SINGLE LIFE, MY GAY BFFS, AND WRITING. Eye candy is nice, though. ;D